Tak Suka Sayur

Kojiq is a 5 years old kid with a 10 years old body size. Well, at least that's the size of clothes he's wearing la *sigh*. The thing about kids with communication problem is that they may not be much aware of their body functions, so they don't really know when to stop eating. But then, actually this is not exclusively their problem only la. Kita sendiri pun kekadang dah kenyang, tapi masih nak melantak lagi kan... hehehe :-)

Kojiq started out as a very very picky eater. Dulu cuma nak makan bubur kosong saja. Kalau ada secebis pun bawang goreng ke ikan ke dalam bubur tu, dia takkan makan. But the therapist taught us how to introduce new foods to him, and it works so well, now we can't get him to stop! Haila!

Now he eats a variety of foods, and he likes hot stuff. Makan nasi, selalu nak ada sambal. Oh, dia sebut 'sum-bel' (huh?). Tekak melayu okkay :-) Problem is, he's OK with carbs and animal proteins, tapi taknak makan sayur, sebab tu ler gemuk kot!

But I guess, masalah anak taknak makan sayur ni, biasalah kot? He loves Subway sandwiches, and that's the only time yang dia akan makan sayur 'coz Mama dia doesn't let him pick out the veggies from the sandwich. Lagi satu, fruits pun dia tak suka, kecuali oranges.

Camana nak tarik minat dia makan sayur and fruits ye, any tips?

He Really IS Spelling!

Wow, lama sungguh aku tak apdet blog ni... kebizian melampau uols...

OK sah, memang Kojiq dah mula kenal huruf dan belajar mengeja. It's really good to watch him sit at his little desk, flipping over pages of his ABC book and spell some words. I haven't been in touch with the kiddies world lately (I don't have kids of my own) so I don't know the current syllabus used.

If I remember correctly, in kindy, we were made to memorize the letters ABC, thereafter baru start spelling. And there's confusion all around for us bilingual kids, because the same spelling words will always sound and mean differently in Bahasa Melayu and in English. Can you paint your house using a feline? The simplest word - CAT- is already confusing mah!

Anyhow, Kojiq is spelling most words phonetically (eh betul ke ayat ni? Aku main blasah je hehehe). That's how khinzir is spelt 'pi-ah-gi' and not 'pi-ai-ji'. So as Kojiq goes through his books, we can hear him say 'keh-eh-ti', 'keh-oh-wa' and 'gi-oh-ah-ti'. Ada paham ka incik? That's cat, cow and goat la :-)

But occassionally he forgets some letters, or rather, dia malas nak pikir, dia mula la melalut. Atau mungkin ke dia sengaja sebut melalut to entertain himself? We don't know, but it's so darn funny. Kitorang gelak golek-golek bila dengar dia eja 'cow' cegini : keh-'oh-o-yo'-'mm-hmm'. Adeh laa.... mana plak datang 'oh-o-yo' ni??? Pastu dia punya 'mm-hmm' tu bunyik cam hero hindustan hahaha :-))

Is He Spelling?

I really really think Kojiq is progressing a lot lately!

Semalam, tengah duduk-duduk depan tv, Kojiq belek buku 'animal picture book' dia. Tetiba dia unjukkan buku tu pada aku, ada gambar haiwan pada mukasurat kanan dan nama haiwan tu pada mukasurat kiri.

Kojiq : "Pi-ah-gi, pig"

Aku ingat aku salah dengar. Aku suruh dia ulang. Dia sebut sekali lagi, lepas tu dia campak buku dan lari kepada Wan dia. Aku hulur buku kat dia dan Wan pulak pujuk dia cakap lagi sekali.

Kali ni, dia tunjuk huruf tu satu demi satu sambil kata, "Pi-ah-gi, pig"

Kitorang terperanjat giler sampai tak terkata, he is obviously spelling a word! Tak kisah la walaupun word pertama dia nak eja kat kitorang tu... err... kurang semenggah... hehehe :-D

Apple & Orange

A few days back, Kojiq did something that surprised us all.

There was a plate of fruits on the dining table. Kojiq picked up an apple, showed it to me and said "apple". Then he put the apple back on the plate, and pointed at an orange and said "oghen".

We felt like crying! He actually initiated a conversation with us! That was the first time he did that with us. Usually it is a case of a response towards our words, if and when he decides to respond la. Finally, finally, he decides to initiate. This is like a humongus step for him!

He probably learned all that at kindy. We have yet to chat with his teacher this week, for sure we will update her on this progress.

So happy! :-D

WORKSHOP @ NASOM

From my mailbox :-

Dear Sir/Madam,

CREATIVE INTERACTIVE SKILLS WITH CHILDREN AND ADULTS ON THE AUTISTIC SPECTRUM, WEDNESDAY TO MONDAY, 12 TO 17 NOVEMBER 2008
BY DR. SUE JENNINGS
YASMIN COLLEGE: 12-1, WISMA MENJALARA, JALAN SS7A/62A, BANDAR MENJALARA, 52200 K.L.

We are pleased to advise that The National Autism Society of Malaysia (NASOM) will be organizing a workshop, "Creative Interactive Skills With Children And Adults On The Autistic Spectrum" on 12 to 17 November 2008 by Dr Sue Jennings. The workshops will be held at Yasmin College, 12-1 Wisma Menjalara, Jalan SS 7A/62A, Bandar Menjalara, 52200 K.L.

Please find attached herewith the event brochure for your attention. As seats are limited, we would appreciate if the registration can reach us by 29 October 2008.

Please do not hesitate to contact us at Tel: 603-7710 4098, Fax: 603-7710 4149 or Email: secretariat@nasom.com.my if you need any further information or assistance. We will be happy to assist.

We look forward to seeing you.

Thank you,

Regards,
Esther Teh
Executive Officer
The National Autism Society of Malaysia (NASOM)
35A Jalan SS 21/37
Damansara Utama
47400 Petaling Jaya
Tel : +603 7710 4098
Fax : + 603 7710 4149
Website: www.nasom.com.my

The Signs : Stims

What is stimming? It is short for self-stimulation or repetitive behaviour. This is another easily recognizable trait of autism.


When a child stims, he does it all by himself without any interaction with another person. He concentrates on a certain repetitive behaviour and in this way, enters into his own world, and seems lost to his surroundings.


One of the most common stims is spinning. Kojiq used to turn his toy cars upside down or on its side, starts to spin a wheel and sit watching it, and would do this for hours on end. For the unsuspecting adults (like what Jenny McCarthy said on Oprah) our reaction upon seeing this would be "oh, he's interested in cars, maybe he'd grow up to be an engineer or a technician". Little do we know *sigh*


Another common stims is lining up objects on the floor. Kojiq used to line up as many as 10 or more matchbox toy cars in a straight line. If anyone removes one of the cars or disturbs the straight line, he would scream and toss up the toys , then start lining them up again.


Another stims he used to do alot was going up and down a slide. Difficult to control if there are other kids also playing on the slide. People thought he was rude and played rough, but the truth is that he didn't know how to take turns sliding with the other kids because he's not totally aware of his surroundings. He was also fascinated by escalators, and it used to be my job to accompany him up and down mall esclators countless times, so tiring! AlhamduliLlah these days he still asks to ride the mall escalators, but just once or twice is enough to satisfy him *phew!*


One stims which Kojiq is still obsessed with nowadays is water play. At any chance he could, he would spill water onto furniture or the floor, then run his hands all over it. Or if he finds any other container, he would pour water from one container into the other repetitively. The ending, when he decides to stop the stims episode, would always be pouring water over the front of his clothes *sigh* It's almost impossible to control this one, because water is available everywhere all the time - including his drinking water. So we resort to giving him only a small portion of drinks at a time, otherwise it's so messy!


Another variation of this stims is the one I mentioned in an earlier post, where he runs around the house playing with electrical switches. Dangerous, I know. We have to constantly watch him, and try to distract him with other activities whenever he starts to reach for the switches.


Other common stims (which Kojiq doesn't do) are flapping hands, rolling objects on the floor, looking or staring at the same book, picture or object, or just staring at a wall.


More about the 'why's and 'how to's of stimming in the next post. Meanwhile, thank you for taking time to read and trying to understand about autism!


:-)

Kojiq Tells How He Feels

Something exciting happened last Sunday!

Actually it started with a reprimand. Kojiq was upset that he wasn't allowed more carbonated drink. So he threw his toys about to vent his anger, and in due process he pushed the toy rocking horse his little brother was riding on, and brother and horse went helter-skelter. In all the panic that ensued, Kojiq was reprimanded by a few slaps on his hands.

Later, when he had calmed down and was snuggling next to me watching tv, his mom sat next to him and pulled him towards her. He resisted a bit. She coaxed him to sit on her lap. He resisted, then he held up his hand and said "akek (sakit)". No big deal, huh?

Well, for a normal kid, that's nothing. But for Kojiq, that was the first time he actually indicated and verbalised what he was feeling! Up till then, Kojiq was able to make up to 3-words sentence, but only to ask for something that he wants - "Kojiq mak(nak) susu". So this incident where he indicated and verbalised how he felt and why he resisted his mom then, was a tremendous leap in his interactive skills. AlhamduliLlah!

Each day comes with little miracles. You just have to look out for it to see and appreciate it!

The Signs : No Eye Contact

The essence of autism is that it is a disorder that impairs interaction (John Levy, "What You Can Do Right Now To Help Your Child With Autism")

There are several early signs through which you can detect whether a child might have autism. I will try to write about them in a series of posts, insyaAllah.

One of the most apparent signs is the child does not make eye contact with anyone else. He can be playing in a room full of people, maybe even with someone beside him trying to speak to him, but he would seem to ignore everyone else. He would be living in his own world. If you try to catch his eyes by turning his face towards you, the eye contact may happen, but flittingly. Why?

This is because eye contact is an intimate form of non-verbal communication and interaction. As autism affects interaction, by refusing eye contact, the child is avoiding interaction.

Kojiq has been going for speech therapy for a while now, and his eye contact has improved tremendously. Here's some tips from the therapist, which we find very helpful :-

(1) Speak to him from a short distance - his visual attention span is only in his immediate surroundings, so if you talk to him from across the room, he will ignore you.

(2) Position for eye contact - try to get down to his eye level so that it is easier for him to look into your eyes. Sit or squat in front of him, when you speak to him.

(3) Attract his attention with an object - find something he likes like a toy car, hold it a few inches in front of your eyes so that he would be forced to look at your eyes if he wants to look at the object.

(4) Make him look into your eyes and indicate what he wants, then only give it to him. He will learn that making eye contact is rewarding.

I hope you find this information helpful. May Allah bless you for the patience and love you give to child in need.

:-)

Hari Raya Jalan-Jalan

Hari Raya Jalan-Jalan is supposed to be fun fun fun for kids. What is there not to enjoy? You get to go to different houses, meet your cousins and new friends, eat and drink as much as you want, maybe even get to play with sparklers, and just before you leave, you get packets containing money from the host, yay!

Well, fun for most kids, anyway.

For Kojiq, Hari Raya is just another day. For Kojiq's mom, Hari Raya Jalan-Jalan is a test on her patience and perseverance.

Kojiq is at that time when his current game is playing with electrical switches - light, fan, air-cond etc. He's tall enough to reach the switches, light enough to be running around at a speed that is difficult for us to catch him, yet heavy enough that when he's showing defiance by sitting or lying down, it is difficult to carry him or pull him to his feet. Imagine the chaotic madness when we go Jalan-Jalan to our relatives' homes!

Sure, the easy way to counter the 'shame' of having your child misbehave at someone else's home is always to punish the child immediately. A slap on the butt, a pinch on the arm, even pulling his ears, will make the child stop his actions for a short while.

But does he understand that all this anger and pain inflicted on him is a result of his 'misbehaviour'? Should he be physically reprimanded in public just so you can 'save face'?

If the child fully understands the consequences of his actions, like a normal child, he would stop misbehaving on his own accord, kan?

Think about it, before you start thrashing your special needs child.

Oh, for the record, Kojiq's mom didn't slap him, but she was finding it hard to hold on to her patience.

The 'Ane' Game

Kojiq is a very affectionate boy, loves to be hugged and tickled. This is exactly the opposite of one of the traits of autism - usually, a child with autism does not like any form of physical contact, because his sensories including on his skin is somewhat differently wired, and a simple touch by our standards, may feel painful for the child. But apparently Kojiq is OK with physical contact.


Although at times Kojiq plays rough, but sometimes it is just to attract our attention so that we will chase after him, then hug and tickle him, and he would collapse in a fit of laughter. Along the years, we developed many tickling games with him. The latest game is the "ane" game :-)


Ane? Ane?? Huk aloh, iklan U Mobile kat tv tulah hehehe :-)


Kojiq would smile and come up to us and say "Ane..." , then we'd go through the advertisement script like this :-


Kojiq : "Ane..."

Me : "Teh tarik satu"

Kojiq : "Blehhh...."

Me : "Nak stengah gelas."

Me : "Tabley!"

Me : "Kenapa...?"

Kojiq : "Why...? *giggle giggle*

Me : "Why? Why?? Why???" *tickle Kojiq*

Kojiq : *gelak guling-guling*


I love this game. And I love watching him smile, then giggle, then burst into laughter, literally rolling on the floor/bed/sofa.


But sometimes aku secara tak sengaja go overboard, Kojiq gelak sampai semput, kena guna inhaler asthma. Time-time gini, aku kena marah ler sebab buat Kojiq semput hehehe :-)

On Oprah Last Night

We don't watch a whole lot of Oprah, so catching the show last night on Astro was a lucky fluke for both Angah and me, for the topic was 'Autism'. The guest speakers were Jenny McCarthy and Holly Robinson Peete (of 21 Jump Street). They were not there as stars or celebrities, but as mothers who have a child with autism, Jenny's Evan, and Holly's RJ.

I am familiar with Jenny, as I have read her book entitled "Louder Than Words", telling of her experience with Evan. Indeed, last night's show focused a lot on this book (more about the book later). But I didn't know about Holly and RJ, so I was interested to hear her speak. She shared her feelings, how she overcame her personal dissappointment, how important it is for families to work together to help the child with autism.

Something she said that I think is important is this - don't call the child "autistic kid". When you say it that way, people will focus on 'autistic' as if the child is inflicted with some terrible contagious disease, and with such negative vibes, people won't be able to appreciate the child. Instead, say "child with autism". This way, you focus on the child first, and then only his condition. It sounds more positive, don't you think so?

Baby Kojiq

The story began five years ago. September 11 2003, to be exact. The first grandchild to my parents, the first baby for Angah & Bangah, he was born via caesarean section two days after Angah had the first signs of labour. We counted 10 little fingers and 10 little toes, he scrumched up his face and wailed, a perfect baby, AlhamduliLlah!

He was the light of our lives - and still is! Since we all live in one house, Angah & Bangah generously shared him with the rest of us - including sharing poopy-diapers-changing, hmmph. I spent hours watching him sleep, the rise and fall of his little chest with every breath he takes, the flutter of his eyelids when dreams interrupt his slumber, and the sweet lips parting in his yawns and sighs. At the slightest sound, one of us would be running to his bassinet, scoop him up in our arms and murmur some lullaby to coax him back to sleep...

Oh, I'm beginning to sound soppy, please forgive me hehehe :-)

Anyway, he is now 5 years old, and I still spend hours watching him sleep :-)

More about Haziq and being diagnosed, in the next post.

Kojiq's World

This blog is dedicated to my beloved nephew Haziq, and thousands of little boys and girls who have the same condition as he does. Also, to all parents, siblings, relatives, caregivers, friends and neighbours of all those little boys and girls, who understand, or are learning to understand, or at least are beginning to learn to accept all those little boys and girls with all their love, for what those little boys and girls truly are - gifts from Him.

I hope this blog will help us understand these little boys and girls, and help us rid of our prejudices against what they have. I wish to share every little bit of information that may be beneficial for children with autism, and I hope readers with information will share theirs with me too. Don't worry if you do not have information to share, your taking time to read this blog is more than enough, and I thank you for that!

This is not a blog written by a professional. I do not have any medical or formal training in caring for children with special needs. What information I have, are probably from readings or interactions with other caregivers of special needs children, or watching tv, or merely from my googling.

But one thing for sure is that I love my nephew, and I give my support to my sister (Haziq's mother), and there is nothing I would not do for them! Family comes first.

People, welcome to my blog about autism.

MIRROR POST

Blog ini didedikasikan kepada anak saudara kesayanganku Haziq, dan ribuan lagi kanak-kanak lelaki dan perempuan yang mempunyai keadaan yang sama dengannya. Juga kepada ibubapa, adik-beradik, saudara-mara, penjaga, sahabat dan jiran kepada semua kanak-kanak tersebut, yang memahami, atau sedang belajar memahami, atau sekurang-kurangnya sedang mula belajar untuk menerima semua kanak-kanak tersebut dengan sepenuh hati, sebagai suatu anugerah dariNya.

Aku harap blog ini akan membantu kita lebih memahami kanak-kanak tersebut, dan membantu kita meghilangkan prejudis terhadap keadaan mereka. Aku ingin berkongsi segala pengetahuan yang mungkin bermanfaat untuk kanak-kanak dengan autism, dan aku harap pembaca yang budiman juga turut berkongsi pengetahuan mereka denganku. Jangan bimbang jika kau tiada pengetahuan untuk dikongsi, kerana sekadar meluangkan masa untuk membacanya pun sudah amat baik, dan aku ucapkan terima kasih!

Blog ini bukan ditulis oleh seorang pakar. Aku tidak mempunyai apa-apa latihan perubatan atau formal dalam hal penjagaan kanak-kanak istimewa. Segala pengetahuan yang aku ada, datang dari bahan bacaan, atau interaksi dengan ibubapa dan penjaga kanak-kanak istimewa yang lain, atau dari tv, atau dari google.

Walau apapun, yang pasti ialah aku sangat sayangkan anak saudaraku, dan aku sentiasa memberi sokongan kepada adikku (ibu Haziq), dan tiada apa yang aku takkan buat untuk mereka! Keluarga adalah yang utama.

Rakan-rakan, selamat datang ke Blogku mengenai autism.